Monday, October 13, 2008
he be so happy now!
Gwen ran into the "office" a few minutes ago super excited. "Mommy! I found a spider!" Oh great. I freaking hate spiders...with a passion. So I ask her where and she says, yet again, extremely excited "on Mommy's clothes!" Damn it! I know cleanliness is next to Godliness. We've been lacking on the Godliness lately. I know I shouldn't have left those freshly washed clothes sitting on my bedroom floor. Now I get to search for spiders as I fold them (the worst job ever...next to dusting and doing the dishes, and cleaning in general. Did I ever tell you that when Morgan asked me what I'd do with the money first if we ever won the lottery, and I said I'd hire someone to clean my house? He told me that was me being lazy. He said it's like hiring someone to come wipe your bum for you just so you don't have to do it. "Whatever!" I said, you could buy a bidet.) Anyway, back to the spider. So I grab my slipper and head off to the bedroom to find the nasty spider. It was just a tiny white one, so no big nasty hobo spider to kill. I smashed the spider (sorry Mom, I know it's bad luck to kill a white spider in the house...my mom would always set them outside when she found one. But to me a spider is a spider. A scary, why did God create these things, spider). After the murder, Gwen proceeded to exclaim "Oh mommy, you killed the spider! He's dead! He be so happy now!" Yeah, well Gwen, I don't think so, but we'll let you continue to think that spiders are happy when they die. Just like we teach you that Honey is the food of the devil.
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6 comments:
"He be so happy now." So funny. It's because he went to spider heaven Gwennie!
I'm getting a lot better at killing them too. I'd rather kill them than let them get away and climb in my bed at night.
Kelly baby,
I have found you out....now that I remembered my password I can reply...and don't blame me if you have bad luck after murdering that poor white spider.
Do you know that we have a play date in exactly 2 days! I be so happy now!
I am proud of you and your killing prowess. It is much better than just sticking a cup over it and letting it hatch babies in your carpet or something (thoughts running through my head)
I have also not told you of my jealously of your vacation. I cant wait to hear all about it and see your new tan lines!
i'm still confused as to why you hate honey. i know you call it bee vomit or something like that, but it's seriously so delicious.
i don't like spiders in my house either. i usually don't kill them, unless they are as big as a nickel including legs. i don't know why the size matters, but it does. i don't mind tiny ones hopping around. i imagine in my head that they like to eat worms (which i loathe), and that makes me feel better.
I am with you. A spider is a spider. Have I told you about when I started crying in the car while Jason was driving because there was a spider on my side and we switched seats while driving? Jason was seriously irritated with me and I just couldn't make myself stop freaking. Tears and all. Maybe we need to see someone professionally. Jason has said that very seriously to me.
Do you think spiders really get to go to Heaven? I hope there is a separate one for them and mosquitoes...and...anacondas because I HATE all of those things. Gwen is a funny little thing - I love reading stories. Your vacation looked wonderful..all inclusive is the way to go, huh?
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